I ask myself “what if” questions sometimes.
A new meeting is coming soon. I’m on a dating website in addition to having the craigslist ad. Friday I got a message that someone had viewed my profile, one that said he put me on his favorites list AND notification that he sent me an email message. I looked at his profile of course and my girl parts said “oh hell yeah.” Of course I would be flat broke and can’t talk to him until monday at 5 at the earliest and if I don’t get my damn bonus check it might not be until wednesday after 5.
He lives some distance away soooooo, I have to ask myself “if he’s the one, what then?” Am I willing to give up this life? This life is Andy and Randy and a fairly secure job and a decent apartment I can afford. This life is also solace. And a little bit of revenge too.
Or if he’s “the one” do I give it all up and move. The “one” will have to be a pretty amazing man to get past the “Andy Obstacle.” He made a major impact on what kind of man I’m truly looking for. I will know him when I meet him.
It actually kind of amazes me that I’m still asking myself these questions at 58.