the short story of Bill Or why I learned to love the bomb and hate moving

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Bill and I were together for about 22 years.  In 22 years we moved 9 times.  The longest we lived anywhere is Lakin and that was 5 years.

In order and the short why;

The first move was to move out of the low rent apartment I was in.  We rented a house.  Then a guy we knew from the bar had a trailer house he wanted to sell so we agreed to rent to own.  We moved to the trailer and we were there for about a year and a half and he sold it out from under us and evicted us.  So the next move was to a dinky trailer we bought on a rent to own thing from a trailer sales place.  I think we were there about 3 years.  Then the neighbors moved away and Bill couldn’t stand to live there any longer so we traded that trailer back in to the same dealer and bought a really nice new Mobile Home and moved to the nice park.  Then Bill’s first wife’s hubby/boyfriend bought the park.  He could not stand to live there one second longer so he started looking at “manufactured homes” on his way home from work.  He agitated and connived with the salesman until I relented and worked the budget and reworked until I figured out how we could afford it.  One of the stipulations was we both had to quit smoking.  I did.  Bill just snuck around and lied about it.  I digress.  Anyway, so we bought a Manufactured Home.  It was actually stick built on a factory floor and the cut in half and put on a carrier frame.  We lived in that house for 5 years.  We were doing okay at least.  We were still paycheck to paycheck most of the time but we were okay.  And then his employer changed the way he got paid from twice a month (24 paychecks a year) to every other week (26 paychecks a year) which if you’re hourly probably isn’t a thing.  But when you’re salary it cuts your monthly income.  It cut ours enough that I couldn’t make the budget work anymore and eventually I said fuck it and gave up on it and we let it foreclose and moved back to Garden.  I’m not willing to take the blame for this even though it was my decision to stop making the house payment and foreclose.  I will say I let him push me into getting that house but I don’t think there was any other choice.  I wanted to just save money and move the Mobile Home.  It would have saved us a fortune.

Then things got interesting.  We were back in Garden 3 years and he did a safety violation so big he’s not rehire able.  Up until that point he was always MR OSHA and then he did something that stupid???  So then he finally got the job in Oklahoma.  OMG did that place ever suck.  We ended up with a ratty trailer in the middle of no-fucking-where.  It was 10 miles to buy ANYTHING.  I will take partial blame for the next move.  I seriously hated Oklahoma so as soon as his 2 year contract was up he started job hunting and got hired in Greeley Co.  He worked 2 months and quit.  They didn’t sue us for the moving money so the quit was legit.  But he had to job hunt again and money was getting short.  He ended up getting a job back at the same plant in Oklahoma but I refused to live in Oklahoma again and we found the house in Liberal.  Of course the next moves were because he up and quit his job and we split up.

Actually moving with Bill was always a huge pain in the ass.  I do not know how he got to be so old and is such an incompetent human being.  The man can’t run a screwdriver or a hammer without fucking something up. So you can imagine what it was like to have to take things apart and put them back together that many times with him.  He’s lucky he lived several times.  I know that on more than one occasion he came close to having a screwdriver embedded in his forehead.

LOL, so, never mind Andy, I can’t live with Bill again because I don’t look good in orange and he’d piss me off so much now that I’d whack him. Probably all the way to dead.

This also *seriously* highlights what a stunning difference it was to move with Andy.  He just moved things exactly the way they were and not even a single leaf got bent or broken.

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